Urico-tale-ic

Very often I find myself leaving my room half an hour before so I can walk down to office. Today was one such auspicious occasion. There were thoughts buzzing like bees around me. I was thinking about the days work. About those transcripts that were waiting for me. I had to call my mother. I had to mail a friend. If anyone could see these thoughts they probably would see a hallow around me that would make me look like a savant. That apart, I was wearing this bright yellow and red shirt that read ‘Hare Ram Hare Krishna’. I was in bright spirits when suddenly ‘phat’! Some bird peed on me! Oh sheesh…

I tried tidying it up using the perfect paraphernalia - a dry leaf. It was perfect because it would not really spoil any more of my belongings. I mean, for Pete’s sake, wasn’t my shirt was enough! I sat all day, grumbling about it, trying to do my work, cribbing again about the birds, trying to concentrate… All in all I was touchy the whole day especially with the smell of urea, albeit a different one.

By noon my colleagues were tired of my constant bickering. And suddenly, Neha tells me “Hey you know it’s a sign of luck? Something really good is going to happen.” Really! I wanted to ask her who is the lucky one, me or Lord Rama since I was wearing a shirt that had his incantations. And if it was Lord Rama, I am sure he didn’t need any. But I chose to leave it at that and said nothing. And then Dipti says, “Was it a crow?” Huh? Isn’t a ‘bird’ enough? I just say “I don’t know and I don’t care”. “Because the crow is the luckiest” she tells me. Now, the discussion was getting to sacrosanct for me to tolerate…. And quiet honestly, if I wanted even an iota of luck, I would stand under the trees day in and day out and wait for the birds to pee on me!

Just then Lady Luck came calling, “Did you finish the transcript?” my boss had called up.

“Sir, I did about 40 minutes and I am left with another 30 minutes or so.” I answer knowing that I am lying through my teeth. I had finished 27 minutes of transcription and still had lots more to do.

“Can you finish it by today?” he asked.

“Umm…I’ll try, but I am sure I will comfortably finish it off by tomorrow evening.” I find myself lying even more.

I walked out for some fresh air.

The sky suddenly turned acid green. And in the uricotelic environs, I was pealing more onions.

Mirkwood was smiling...